personal, poetry

Cold Water

perhaps my hands, too, 
could disappear into the mist.

as a child, i dreamt of flight – 
fairy wings to burst through

my shoulder blades – fins
to sprout from my feet.

there’s a piece that wishes
to be weightless, high above

the ocean floor, high above
the shore, high above

this pale blue dot – until i see everything,
bathed in sunlight, the dollhouses

i get to play with. another step out – 
another step from shore –

and the pins and needles
forge my limbs into ice blocks.

your sea foam hands envelop me
in freezing, exhilarating here.

you here – salty and breathtaking
and ceaseless and fleeting –

you keep me heavy.
higher and higher, 

you grow with the moon –
and before i know it,

i’m up to my neck in you,
my wings frozen shut.

you hurt me.
but you hold me.